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IgorUnchained
06-03-2005, 12:12 AM
I found this cool list of "ways to be annoying"....I dont need any help in that department so I figured I would pass it on to all of you!

http://www.jayssite.com/jokes/annoying/guide_to_being_annoying.html#realhoot

makarusty
06-03-2005, 05:42 AM
LOL.. this is going to be way harsh but Im going to try do the whole pizza list

Boltfan92153
06-03-2005, 01:28 PM
Jay's Site.com > Jokes > Guide to being annoying
Guide to being annoying

- Calling a pizza place:
Rent a pizza.
Have your pizza "shaken, not stirred."
Ask to see a menu.
Specify that your order is "to go".
Make up a credit card name. Ask if they accept it.
Use CB lingo where applicable.
Order a Big Mac Extra Value Meal.
Terminate the call with, "Remember, we never had this conversation."
Tell the order taker a rival pizza place is on the other line and you're going with the lowest bidder.
Give them your address, exclaim "Oh, just surprise me!" and hang up.
Answer their questions with questions.
In your breathiest voice, tell them to cut the crap about nutrition and ask if they have something outlandishly sinful.
Sing the order to the tune of your favorite Christmas song.
Do not name the toppings you want. Rather, spell them out.
Stutter on the letter "p."
Ask what the order taker is wearing.
Crack your knuckles into the receiver.
Say hello, act stunned for five seconds, then behave as if they called you.
Rattle off your order with a determined air. If they ask if you would like drinks with that, panic and become disoriented.
Tell the order taker you're depressed. Get him/her to cheer you up.
Make a list of exotic cuisines. Order them as toppings. ("Can I have pepperoni, sausage, and maybe some caviar?")
Change your accent every three seconds.
Act like you know the order taker from somewhere. Say "Bed-Wetters' Camp, right?"
If they repeat the order to make sure they have it right, say "OK. That'll be $10.99; please pull up to the first window."
Ask if you get to keep the pizza box. When they say yes, heave a sigh of relief.
Say "Are you sure this is (Pizza Place)? When they say yes, say "Well, so is this! You've got some explaining to do!" When they finally offer proof that it is, in fact (Pizza Place), start to cry and ask, "Do you know what it's like to be lied to?"
Move the mouthpiece farther and farther from your lips as you speak. When the call ends, jerk the mouthpiece back into place and scream goodbye at the top of your lungs.
Tell them to double-check to make sure your pizza is, in fact, dead.
Imitate the order taker's voice.
Eliminate verbs from your speech.
When they say "What would you like?" say, "Huh? Oh, you mean now."
Say it's your anniversary and you'd appreciate if the deliverer hid behind some furniture waiting for your spouse to arrive so you can surprise him/her.
Ask if they have any idea what is at stake with this pizza.
Order a slice, not a whole pizza.
Doze off in the middle of the order, catch yourself, and say "Where was I? Who are you?"
Psychoanalyze the order taker.
Ask what their phone number is. Hang up, call them, and ask again.
Order two toppings, then say, "No, they'll start fighting."
Learn to properly pronounce the ingredients of a Twinkie. Ask that these be included in the pizza.
Tell the order taker to tell the manager to tell his supervisor he's fired.
Report a petty theft to the order taker.
Ask for the guy who took your order last time.
If he/she suggests anything, adamantly declare, "I shall not be swayed by your sweet words."
Wonder aloud if you should trim those nose hairs.
Start the conversation with "My Call to (Pizza Place), Take 1, and. . . action!"
Ask if the pizza is organically grown.
Ask about pizza maintenance and repair.
Be vague in your order.
When they repeat your order, say "Again, with a little more OOMPH this time."
Start the conversation by reciting today's date and saying, "This may be my last entry."
State your order and say that's as far as this relationship is going to get.
Ask if they're familiar with the term "spanking a pizza." Make up a description to go with the term. Ask that this be done to your pizza.
Say "Kssssssssssssssht" rather loudly into the phone. Ask if they felt that.
When listing toppings you want on your pizza, include another pizza.
Learn to play a blues riff on the harmonica. Stop talking at regular intervals to play it.
Ask if they would like to sample your pizza. Suggest an even trade.
Put them on hold.
Teach the order taker a secret code. Use the code on all subsequent orders.
Mumble, "There's a bomb under your seat." When asked to repeat that, say "I said 'sauce smothered with meat'."
Make the first topping you order mushrooms. Make the last thing you say "No mushrooms, please." Hang up before they have a chance to respond.
When the order is repeated, change it slightly. When it is repeated again, change it again. On the third time, say "You just don't get it, do you?"
When you're given the price, say "Ooooooo, that sounds complicated. I hate math."
Order a one-inch pizza.
Order term life insurance.
When they say "Will that be all?", snicker and say "We'll find out, won't we?"
Ask how many dolphins were killed to make that pizza.
While on the phone, fake entering puberty. Fluctuate pitch often; act embarrassed.
Dance all around the word "pizza." Avoid saying it at all costs. If he/she says it, say "Please don't mention that word."
Have a movie with a good car chase scene playing loudly in the background. Yell "OW!" when a bullet is fired.
If he/she suggests a side order, ask why he/she is punishing you.
Order a steamed pizza.
Get taker's name. Later, call exactly on the hour to say, "This is your (time of day) wake-up call, So-and-so." Hang up.
Offer to pay for the pizza with a public flogging.







That is funny

thehotdelancey
06-03-2005, 03:38 PM
I liked the wal mart setting the alarm clocks at ten minute intervals thing...might eb worth a try sometime!

broncossuck7
06-05-2005, 03:39 PM
call the oporator and ask for the date, thats funny

IgorUnchained
06-05-2005, 07:43 PM
Walk up to an employee and tell him in an official tone, "I think we've got a Code 3 in Housewares," and see what happens.


That is one of my favorite ones.....it would work at any Wal-Martish store.

chargertom
06-05-2005, 08:09 PM
If you want to have some fun ... next time a telemarketer calls your house ... see how many times you can say "Thank You" before they hang up on you. Don't say anything after hello, besides thank you. It is hilarious.

Go Chargers! :Bolt:

mgpretzel
06-05-2005, 11:12 PM
The best one I've done is... I put all my spare change in my ash tray in the car. Well one time I went to a drive through burgar place. And when I got to the window to pay..... I Dumped ALL the change from the ash tray in to her hand. there was about 15 dollars in small change in that tray. she looked at me and I just smiled, and said I thik thats about right. She went and counted it and brought back my change!!!!

the thing was... next time I went there.... I got that lady again, I paid her like normal people... I was to get $1.65 back she brought me all change! I laughed so hard!

But yea paying stuff in all change is funny

SDRaiderH8er
06-06-2005, 09:14 AM
Wrong Phone Numbers........

I had one looking for his Girl friend, I kept telling him he had the wrong number, he kept telling me he had the right number, and he wanted to talk to his girl friend. I tried to tell him but he didnt want to listen, then he said he was going to come over and kick my rearend, I egged him on, he was getting mad, I egged him on. I still dont know if he found his girlfriend, but I know he slammed the phone down, and he was on his way over to kick my rearend.

I had a phone number that was 1 digit off from a store in Clairemont, I had a number that ended in a 9, theirs ended in 6, I had call waiting, so if you ever called that store, and i answered the phone, and I told you that I would page them, I really hung up on you, how long did you wait?

Have you ever gotten a Phone call asking if this is so and so pizza joint? I have. And when I took the order, I wonder how long they waited?

Chargeroo
06-07-2005, 10:38 AM
If you want to have some fun ... next time a telemarketer calls your house ... see how many times you can say "Thank You" before they hang up on you. Don't say anything after hello, besides thank you. It is hilarious.

Go Chargers! :Bolt:
Telemarketers - I tell them "hold on a minute please", than I lay the phone down and see how long it is before they hang up. Kind of fun!

SDRaiderH8er
06-07-2005, 11:30 AM
Telemarketers - I tell them "hold on a minute please", than I lay the phone down and see how long it is before they hang up. Kind of fun!

What about those "Survey" takers, when they factor in the 3 % margain for error, I am that 3% :D